Once There Was the Sun

Gosh I just love sunshine. The way it streams into the house early in the morning, like so much molten air, it's just so beautiful and uplifting. I even like the word "Sunshine", It's fun to say. I don't like the heat though, I hate sweating and bugs and humidity. I also love the rain, particularly a nice hard downpour or, even better, a lightning storm. Sometimes when there is a storm late at night I just sit up in bed and watch the flashes of light burn across the sky. I could walk in drenching rain and be ecstatically happy. I read somewhere that lightning is an aphrodisiac to alligators; maybe it has a similar affect on me (although I don't actually get horny haha). I also feel a particular attachment to the moon. I love the moon. Full moons make me happy; I make it a point to howl at every full moon. No really, it's true. I'm not some mad person who thinks I'll change into a creature of the night or something, I just feel that the moon has some sort of connection to all life. It makes things happen, it affects people and changes. Heck, it affects the tides, I think it deserves a bit of reverence.

Okay, I'll change subject now, I'm sure my musing on the power and beauty of nature can get boring (although admittedly, it could fit a whole post). I'm trying to think of a title for this post and it's pretty hard. In fact, coming up with a title for this blog was also hard. I wanted something interesting and smart but I couldn't think of anything that wasn't cliche. I finally chose On the Edge of My Brain because that's the feeling you get when you're trying to say or remember something but it won't quite come out. most people say "on the tip of my tongue" but I've always felt as though whatever it was that was stuck wasn't sitting on the tip of my tongue but standing at the edge of my brain, afraid to jump. I liked On the Edge of My Brain because it was an expression that I didn't think many people used (what with the popularity of the tip of everyone's tongue) so it was uniquely me. I also wanted my blog to be about all the things I want to say when they just pop into my head, or something I've been thinking about or trying to figure out all day. Something stuck in my head that I've been dying to get out. I know I've really just written personal musings so far and I'm sure no great philosophical or scientific theories will appear in future posts, but I felt that what I had to say was interesting and important, if only to ensure that I had a voice in the vast hourglass of the universe.

Even after I chose it though, I wasn't sure On the Edge of My Brain said everything I wanted to say. It's so difficult to represent your whole self in one short sentence or space in time, because people are more than just their current favourite lyric or whatever else most people post as MSN names and Facebook statuses (yes that is the correct pluralization). I guess that's why I could never get a tattoo. How could my whole mad self be depicted in a faerie or a quotation or flowers growing out of the eyes of a skull held in the hands of Jesus with koi fish all around (every tattoo EVER)? I'm more complicated than that and I'm going to keep adding layers to myself until I'm this great big onion of mystery.

anyway, I guess that's all I was thinking of this morning and I wanted to share it with someone. I wish you all a good day and I hope you enjoy whatever sun, rain, or snow is streaking past your window and possibly into your house. And howl at the moon. Trust me, it feels wonderful.